Living Zen Life

Not shikintaza - just sitting still
as now, outside in the spring evening,
no better thing to do or place to go.
Carol often said, seeing me leap up
to get or do something or other
rarely important hardly necessary,
"You're like a Mexican jumping bean!"
All those years she was right.

It is a practice for me
not unlike shikintaza - just sit.
She would appreciate that I am trying
making an effort at last
if too late for her.
It helps I no longer have a home 
a large yard, garage, car
all seeming to require my constant attention.

How often I interrupted her calm way.
Had I learned my lesson sooner 
one I am practicing now -
to be still, quiet, at rest -
she too could have enjoyed her rest the more.
On the scale of things I might have done better
my annoying habit would not rank high.
That it is on the scale at all makes me sad.